PLIGHT

Came across this matrimonial and was pretty amused by her parents' wits! (and she being a silent spectator to her online-sale!)

"....Her partner should be an IITian graduate with masters degree from USA and he must be from AGARWAL family. Well, there are lot many things about my daughter for which our family is proud of. An IITian Agarwal with masters degree can surely be a perfect match for my daughter."

My first reaction was- son of a bitch! Selling off his daughter or wat And I could anticipate the 'numaish' of that girl clad in a saari, serving tea 'n snacks to some IITian's parents and they agreeing for 'it'; much to the rejoice of her proud father- proud now, since they have finally done their duty in 'the best possible way'- I mean getting such a "good" groom must be surely the best way! After all being in IIT or IIM would have, for sure, inculcated mannerisms, grander, beauty and most importantly compasion & commitment in him. Who the hell cares, say for example, about his nature.

Family background and some hushed up asking around and 'spying' on the guy is enough for such parents (as if they can do more!) when it comes to "unburdening their obligations" - the girl being an obligation - their so called obligation - which, half the time, they themselves make an obligation by not letting her be truly independent, so much so as to be able to chose a good guy as life partner. But alas how can she when she hasn't ever been even allowed to meet guys, always studied in girls schools and was never let free when in college.

And her so called good culture and her traditional values are limited to some smart-ass tricks and frivolities like listening to parents killing your own wishes and desires, being good at studies and make a good (read richly paying) career, being able to maintain the household nicely, marrying Mr. Right, albeit right according to her parents, and then keeping everyone in her 'sasural' happy and literally blindly worshipping the man tied to her 'pallu' most of the times without asking her own genuine interest and choice.

No nothing like that I am totally against arranged marriages like this. I'll gladly go by my parents choice too, what all I would ever need to ensure is that she is my choice too, that we are compatible enough and mature enough for each other - before marriage getting to know each other, helping out in each other work, sharing day-to-day lives, going out and knowing each other makes it a not at all an arranged marriage but a "love-marriage-with-arranged-girl" [and I wouldn't mind making out too ]. Purely arranged ones are like tying you onto a dog (or a bitch as the case might be!) assuring you it'll protect you and look after you - and without telling you how long its canines are and how mad is the dog (or the bitch) and that there is no cure (like those 14 injections) when this one will bite But then we don't listen much about the biting phenomena since it is slowly but surely fed to us (by parents and social fabric) to "live what you've got" and not even trying to find your better half yourself

. . . . and my only concern for these scopeless fellas (who need someone else to find them their better halves) is that- marriage must be a biiiig adjustment, sacrifice and commitment- and very unfortunately its all left for the girl to do :( She should adjust, commit and sacrifice, she should change all over, she should familiarise herself with the culture/rituals/values of her husband's family, she should get accustomed to new ways, she should uphold their honour in the society, she should have a past like a clean slate, she should slog all the day at home making adjustments and pull her ass up the wall at office if she is a working women and nothing like a career-ambitious wife exists (barring a few exceptions here 'n there). At most its child birth, till she can afford to work independently all on her own - imagine wat goes if she is transferred and he gets a transfered in a job...... and the shit continues to hit the fan.

Bullshit why don't they get a paid maid to work and some paid one to fuk