An obiter dictum

bye bye blogspot

2005-07-24T12:25:00.000+05:30

Finally I think its time to make a move.
This one seems to be a better one!

PLIGHT

2005-07-23T05:05:00.000+05:30

Came across this matrimonial and was pretty amused by her parents' wits! (and she being a silent spectator to her online-sale!)

"....Her partner should be an IITian graduate with masters degree from USA and he must be from AGARWAL family. Well, there are lot many things about my daughter for which our family is proud of. An IITian Agarwal with masters degree can surely be a perfect match for my daughter."

My first reaction was- son of a bitch! Selling off his daughter or wat And I could anticipate the 'numaish' of that girl clad in a saari, serving tea 'n snacks to some IITian's parents and they agreeing for 'it'; much to the rejoice of her proud father- proud now, since they have finally done their duty in 'the best possible way'- I mean getting such a "good" groom must be surely the best way! After all being in IIT or IIM would have, for sure, inculcated mannerisms, grander, beauty and most importantly compasion & commitment in him. Who the hell cares, say for example, about his nature.

Family background and some hushed up asking around and 'spying' on the guy is enough for such parents (as if they can do more!) when it comes to "unburdening their obligations" - the girl being an obligation - their so called obligation - which, half the time, they themselves make an obligation by not letting her be truly independent, so much so as to be able to chose a good guy as life partner. But alas how can she when she hasn't ever been even allowed to meet guys, always studied in girls schools and was never let free when in college.

And her so called good culture and her traditional values are limited to some smart-ass tricks and frivolities like listening to parents killing your own wishes and desires, being good at studies and make a good (read richly paying) career, being able to maintain the household nicely, marrying Mr. Right, albeit right according to her parents, and then keeping everyone in her 'sasural' happy and literally blindly worshipping the man tied to her 'pallu' most of the times without asking her own genuine interest and choice.

No nothing like that I am totally against arranged marriages like this. I'll gladly go by my parents choice too, what all I would ever need to ensure is that she is my choice too, that we are compatible enough and mature enough for each other - before marriage getting to know each other, helping out in each other work, sharing day-to-day lives, going out and knowing each other makes it a not at all an arranged marriage but a "love-marriage-with-arranged-girl" [and I wouldn't mind making out too ]. Purely arranged ones are like tying you onto a dog (or a bitch as the case might be!) assuring you it'll protect you and look after you - and without telling you how long its canines are and how mad is the dog (or the bitch) and that there is no cure (like those 14 injections) when this one will bite But then we don't listen much about the biting phenomena since it is slowly but surely fed to us (by parents and social fabric) to "live what you've got" and not even trying to find your better half yourself

. . . . and my only concern for these scopeless fellas (who need someone else to find them their better halves) is that- marriage must be a biiiig adjustment, sacrifice and commitment- and very unfortunately its all left for the girl to do :( She should adjust, commit and sacrifice, she should change all over, she should familiarise herself with the culture/rituals/values of her husband's family, she should get accustomed to new ways, she should uphold their honour in the society, she should have a past like a clean slate, she should slog all the day at home making adjustments and pull her ass up the wall at office if she is a working women and nothing like a career-ambitious wife exists (barring a few exceptions here 'n there). At most its child birth, till she can afford to work independently all on her own - imagine wat goes if she is transferred and he gets a transfered in a job...... and the shit continues to hit the fan.

Bullshit why don't they get a paid maid to work and some paid one to fuk

Surely You're Joking my F.R.I.E.N.D.

2005-06-30T02:34:00.000+05:30

A message left in by a friend..... and I am seriouslly thinking of giving up on watever meagre studies upon which my life is thriving by! by the way I am wondering where those specs might have gone (lost in my 10x12 room!) since I did away with them 4 years back!!

"chal bye dear, happy time studg, maggu meri jaan, kaise lagte ho yeh imagine karti hoon yuhin sitting seriously studg, with a book and a pen, memorising something, with ur specs on, do nahi char aankho se book mein ghur te hue. wow kya scene hai"

I am TWO

2005-06-28T13:56:00.000+05:30

I am the number
2
I am friendly
_

what number are you?

this quiz by orsa

MIT Weblog Survey

2005-06-28T12:43:00.000+05:30

worthwhile survey!
Introspecting and I am sure would be something fruitful and important when MIT is giving these resources to it! the good thing being it hardly takes 10 min :D

Read here about the survey. Awaiting the results impatiently :D

2005-06-14T04:14:00.000+05:30

We are still together!!

mailed in by a friend, written in remembrance of long lost mother

She can't live without me,
I can't live without her,
However, I am still alive!
It only means that we are still together.

Ours' is the relation like that of the soul and the body,
What's the body without the soul????
However, my body is still functioning well!!!!
It only means my soul is still within me,
It only means we are still together,
It simply means her soul within me.

My kinda girl

2005-06-05T00:50:00.000+05:30

also something like this apart from being blah blah blah. . . .

She's A Little Too Good For Me by Bryan Adams

She got the brains - she got the looks
She knows all the right people - reads all the right books
She's got my name - she's got my number
But what she see's in me I sometimes wonder

She's a little too good for me
She's gonna change me if I let her
She's a little too good for me
But I'm getting better

I'm just a guy - I'm just me
I'm happy with my feet up on the table - in front of my TV
We're worlds apart - we're night and day
She's dinner by candle light - I'm just a take-away

She's a little too good for me
She's gonna change me if I let her
She's a little too good for me
But I'm getting better

She's says I do something to her
All her friends say I'm a loser

Birthday Colours !

2005-05-31T17:41:00.000+05:30

a fwd. mail . . .
It said my B'day colour is Navy Blue and this is what Navy Blue stands for:

You are attractive, and love your life. You have a strong feeling towards everything. And very easily distracted. Once you get angry at someone, it's hard for you to forgive them.

Wow! that was one helluva description of myself

Too much on her mind

2005-05-30T13:44:00.000+05:30

was rummaging thru' the blogdom and came across Ithilwyn's blog; has a passion to write, very organised writings and touching too! Oh and by the way she is the featured blogger on blogdrive lately :)

Here is her latest post {wrote my heart out in much better way than I could have}

Too much on my mind.

Okay, I need to vent a bit. Or something. Maybe it won't really be venting, but I need to express myself here in order to organize my thoughts.First of all, there is a scene in this one movie I like, Center Stage, where one of the ballet instructors tells a rebellious young student that when things get tough, she needs to come back "here" (placing her hand on the practice bar). That practice room was a place of safety, of serenity. That's what journalling is for me. It's like my home base. When things don't go well, or even when things do, this is where I end up.Writing has always been so essential to me. I've kept a journal since I was ten! Over the years, I've learned to express in my writing what I am unable to get out in any other way. It is the outlet for all the things I want to say but can't. It's also my catharsis. I don't express my emotions often...at least I don't think so. I keep things bottled up, and while those who know me well can tell when I'm upset about something, I don't broadcast it to the world or even talk through things with the people who do notice. Instead, I come here, or to my paper journal, and I write about it. This is how I deal with my feelings, whatever they are. Here I can process through things and deal with them without having to worry about offending anyone (typically, though it has been known to happen) or getting any really weird advice or even good advice that I'm just not ready for.Maybe it's not such a good thing, this internalization of everything. It makes me seem strong without really being strong. It makes it difficult to really open up to people and be honest with them about how I feel. It makes me avoid confrontation. There are so many times that I feel hurt or angry, and I just let it pass. Typically, I just get over the feeling, move on and forget about it. The benefit of this whole process is that I can move on and not hold any resentment or regret. It makes me wonder if it's really all that bad--to be able to let go of the petty things and work past them without upsetting anyone but myself. (I guess I should insert here that I do know how to deal with confrontation when necessary, when it's a really big issue. I'm just always concerned about rocking the boat if it's something that is just me, just something I need to deal with and surrender.) Writing is always my prefered way of dealing with anything, whether it's simply working it out in my journal, or writing a note or email to someone. I can say things in writing to a person that I'm just not comfortable saying in person. Granted, a lot of what I write does not come anywhere near this kind of depth, but the only way I can get to that depth and feel comfortable sharing that way is to build and develop this method of communication over time.I know that I need to work on being able to actually talk things through with people. I know that it will eventually be necessary to formulate words, to be able to speak what I'm thinking. But for now, the best way to really get to know me is to read me. This is me. It's at least the way that I see myself, and I can't be more honest than sharing with you the image I have of me.

Things to learn from dogs !

2005-05-29T17:14:00.000+05:30

from personal convictions, fwd. mails and random websites...
their apparent triviality makes them all the more beautiful for me to live up to them.

* Never pass up an opportunity to go for a ride in the car.

* Allow the experience of fresh air and wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.

* When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

* When it is in your best interest, practice obedience.

* Let other's know when they've invaded your territory.

* Take naps and stretch before rising.

* Run, romp, and play daily.

* Eat with gusto and enthusiasm.

* Be loyal.

* Never pretend to be something you're not.

* If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.

* When someone is having a bad day, sit close and nuzzle them gently.

* Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

* Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.

* On hot days, drink lots of water and lay under a shady tree.

* No matter how often you're scolded, buy into the guilt thing and pout...run right back and make friends.

* Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

Late Night Wishes

2005-05-21T14:43:00.000+05:30

[well late night or early morning or wateverrr . . . . ]

"its 4:30 (am) ... me wondering -- a sweetly silly girl, snuggled up in her sheets, in some silken night dress, all dreamy abt her life n career, wishing biig things to come her way .. sleeping tight ... (she is) partly sweet, partly funny ..(I) would say mostly silly .... missed by a few ... cherished by many ... she must have already had most of her goodnite sleep ... just some hours remaining. . . .. .... wishing those to be her deepest, cosiest, snuggest and most satisfying early morning sleep and then a lovely day ahead... .. "

The art of kissing!

2005-05-17T16:06:00.000+05:30

So was kissing described on one of the sites (oh which by the way I stumbled upon while googling about the 'art of french kissing') in this amusing sentence: Kissing is to teen life what baseball is to America. How very true ;)

The other day I had read ALL the articles on media.orkut and felt the some a few were written exceptionally well, the art of french kissing being one of them. I primarily wanted to put down that article here but then thought may be before writing about it, I'll get more knowledgeable myself [of course, theoretically ;;)]. Hence went around googling this, and came up with some genuine good reads :)

Links, which I think, are worth your time:
Kissing Books
FAQ on Kissing by teenadvice.com
Kissing Tips, Techniques and resources.
Kissing.com

Last but not the least,take this quiz to know if you are a good kisser!!!! Pretty long but amusing and interesting one- i'd say insightful too! Oh by the way my quiz results- "Your score is 78. You are a casanova in the making. Keep practicing and you'll soon be the best of the best of the best!"

please apply to my yahoo ID for candidature for practising. Some tongue never killed anyone!

NIGHT

2005-05-14T18:57:00.000+05:30

[sent by her in mail]

When the moon shines bright,
And the stars take their place upright,
In the silent darkness of the night,
It's definitely a wonderful sight.

The maiden comes along the waves,
Seek the beauty of night she prays,
But men asleep and none to bother,
The rhythm divine and her nonchalant behavior.

She runs from here and there until,
Her hair gets woven in the waters still,
From the falls of the dark mountains,
She whisper loud and clear even in rains.

She wants to be everybody's dream,
She wants to run like a pure stream,
And send across the message of love,
To people like a white dove......

But as the sun shines again at dawn,
With vibrant charisma and rhythm divine,
Her beauty sinks down in ocean blue,
And leaves the imprints on the sands for you.

......sitting by the window at night

thinking .... of many things.

Why now and never then ?

2005-04-27T19:27:00.000+05:30

And seeing these dates, one would get into serious doubts about why now and never then- what kept me from blogging since so long? And I would seriouslly think about telling him/her that Sorry friend, even I also am not aware why !! Well kinda confused about the reasons. Actually the last I blogged was immediately after pari's birth; and then this blog slipped into the neglected lot and throughout the semester I never looked back- not even at 12th Feb realising its been a month I had been away from my dear blog or not on 14th Feb, to write about my trip to Borivali and neither later. The indifference grew with time untill 1st April ..... it was only then that I realised something rare has happened, which I had ever assumed it not possible in all eternities and I DO need to document it somewhere! But the elated feelings came and went, without getting into black 'n white- for lack of time and for a skepticism regarding where to start off- now that it had been so looong, I was uncomfortable and feeling much out of touch to start writing again so much so that I wasn't getting any ideas about where to start.
This was rather silly and only during the highly charged times of end-semester exams I started writing after coming across my old favourite song by change:

"It has to start somewhere
It has to start sometime
What better place than here
What better time than now."

. . . realising I had been a fool to not even drop a few lines and it was nothing more than being lethargy Wishign "Happy Realisation!!"to myself, I wrote this entry about my b'day experience the same night of some exam :D

And now off I go now !!

Aishwarya!

2005-04-24T03:00:00.000+05:30

She is simply awesome, she rocks the scene like no one else can!!

Playing Ms. Lalita 'unmarried' Bakshi she steals the limelight in the movie Bride and Prejudice. Especially the song 'no life without wife' is one of my all time favourites; the description of an ideal man being lovely therein. I wouldn't go talking about the movie since I believe everyone must have seen it at least once! If not then my only talking would be, "you have missed someting beautifully indian, real-life, down to earth and ironic!" A few downloads can be found here.

One of the infinitely many things I loved is the character she plays; her search for an ideal man; and the pains, her own psychological sequences; and friends' and family's mindsets she has to go through (or for that matter every average indian girl has to go thru'). Her character powerfuly potrays the Indian stereotypical mindset in a lovely way, which is illuminating, enchanting and and NOT off-putting. Starting right from "Poor Mr. Kohli, he has no life without wife!", the drama unfolds with the mother trying to get, for her 4 daughters, some rich NRIs, and how some of them want it badly but some (including ash) runs from the situation.

A particular thing from the very start of the song, which has, kind of, engraved in my mind is that bothred look she gives to Mr. Kohli when her mother talks about they both getting together! You wouldn't agree with me any less that she looks awesome wearing that facial expression (oh did I mentioned that girls look amazingly adorable when red with anger)!! Here are a few screenshots of her expressions [1,2,3,4,5] and some other movie stills. Have a read of the partial lyrics of the song (and incomplete; please point me to the correct words/lines wherever I have missed them):

I don't want a man who ties me down
does what he wants while I hang around.
I don't want a man whos shrewd and loud
wants a pretty wife to make him proud.

I don't want a man who cann't be funny,
............................................................

I don't want a man who grabs the best seat
cann't close his mouth when he starts to eat.
I don't want a man who likes to drink
or leaves his dirty dishes in the sink!

I dont want a man who ?[wants] his mummy
a ?[blad] head with too much tummy
I dont want a man who is dead in the head
............................................................

I just want a man with a real soul
who wants ..... quality and not control.
I just want a man good and smart
with a really sharp mind and a really big heart.
I just want a man not scared to weep
to hold me close when we are asleep.

I just want a man who loves romance
who'd clear the floor and ask me to dance
I just want a man who gives some back
who talks to me and not my ?[rack]
I just want a man whose spirit is clean
who'd hold my hand and walk the world with me.....

The description Ash gives, in this song, of her supposedly ideal man is flabbergasting. Giving a different dimension to being someone's man! In fact, for me its kind of enlightening and some food for thought! A different face of the life's prism to stare at the life from. But just on a second thought a part of it seems as if its too much to ask from a man! I mean its like wanting the best. I am soo scared, what if everyone wants only the best [tab mera kya hoga].

Me and My Serendipity!

2005-04-20T04:18:00.000+05:30

Happy b'day to you
Happy b'day to you
Happy b'day dear ashish
Happy b'day to you . . . . .

And so it used to go for many years :)

then come April 1, 2005 suddenly and wtf - everyone forgets it I must confess that it was one of the most nbdu days for me- upcoming MLC elections, b'day bumps, not being able to meet Shweta and Meeta since long, Neha's growing indifference and busyness, no call from didi-jiju at 31st March midnite, another quiz the next day and what not .... ! and amidst all that the only thing I was looking fwd. to was my b'day! but alas. . . . . .

Neither was the nite of 31st a good one - was mostly sleepless :( I woke up early on 1st and was killing the day by sleeping again in afternoon when the watchman announced for me to come down. And being in my towel without anything on, I was cursing him like anything before getting dumb-founded to see Meeta waiting for me downstairs ! Whoaaa another big shock was waiting at the hostel gate- SHWETA!! Yes, Shweta, of all people on the earth! God knows how they both made it till hostel but it was one hell of a lovely surprise I will never forget my life (neither will Meeta forget, I guess, that blown over look of surprise on my face all her life!!). Wishes poured in as usual and not to mention a wonderful short-kurta (the same one I had thot of buying after talking to jiju a day before!) and a lovely Christian Daniel wrist watch. And not to forget a few words (well ... they were actually a few papers!)- very touching and much awaited - basically direct dil seAll of this was obviouslly more than I could ever dreamt about; hence leaving me absolutely speechless, so much so that even a thanks barely came out!

By evening my fellow sysads turned my thoughts about not deserving their trust/confidence upside-down by making the MLC post yet another undigestable reality for me- with 13 votes of 14! Thanks to all of them

Though not the above mentioned one but they both wrote another b'day song to me- an unsung, unsaid song of love only felt within :) and I will be forever grateful to both of you Shweta and Meeta for making it my most rememberable b'day ever

Just that I missed a few special people (I hope they are listening!); and missed them biiig time Donno why but no matter how hard I try I ain't able to get, out of my head, their absence on THE DAY

Wat a lil' she devil

2005-01-12T03:51:00.000+05:30

Yeah what a little she devil she is!! Just A day old and she wouldn't sleep on bed or in her swing- she DOES need didi's lap COMPULSORILY. Either give her that or let no one till 2 rooms on either side sleep :D cries all night and sleeps between 6-7 am in the morning. And I was thinking I will spoil her. Still I am wishing for a lot more to come her way, well .... should rather say OUR way! Talked to didi-jiju and mumma today and all were on cloud nine, sleep ridden, tired and of course everyone has come up with their own names of the princess! "pankhudi" (hindi for petals), pari, choti, mamujaan ki bhaanji .. .. well the list increments with every family member
Well so long about her - guess she might be awake:D Good nite bhaanji, let my akka sleep in peace ;)

YESSS! Its a Girl

2005-01-11T06:18:00.000+05:30

Its suchaaa healthy girl [whopping 3.9 kgs!] and so damn lovely (as I get from jiju's and akka's talk!). The most awaited and already the most loved member has finally arrived- my chweet lil' bhaanji 0052 hrs on 11th Jan 2005. I am soo wordless, dont know what to write :D.
As a matter of fact, I had always wanted a bhaanji and not a bhaanja :> Afterall we guys are congenital rascals, it'd be much more lovely to spoil a niece and bring her up

Incidently Neha's B'day is also the same day and she wished for this birth to be on 11th too! Happy b'day to you both cute, lil' girls; love ya both, pucchhhhh

busy, busy and more busy !

2005-01-10T15:52:00.000+05:30

Was slugging since past 4 days day in and day out to work out my site. I didn't knew the simplicity of html and complexity of JavaScript would be this damn painful I am tired of the bullshit stuff in html, the same things over and over again and sooo many tags, Oh god! and JavaScript is way too much technical to use a small snippet in a webpage, without knowing it properly. I had though I will read it a bit and use the small, simple features for my site, which anyway is going to be the simplest possible ever

Anyways that was the reason I was not here on my blog since a week, also didn't read anything, donno what all things people might have written in a week- oh soo many posts waiting n wanting to be read !! Well anyway still have a lot to do about my page, I should leave rite away!

BuddySpace

2005-01-06T17:34:00.000+05:30

Instant messaging has its own charms else than messaging itself! See for example our age old yahoo. Its coming in with soo many features, which no one would have thought of integrating with any chat client, just a few years back. Some of them which I prefer are Yahoo Search directly from an IM window, audibles, contact info on the fly, launchcast radio, people search from yahoo directory, Stealth Settings for every user n group, infinitely long status message, games and IMVs, Avatars and what not. Now that they are integrating whole surfing experience and innovative technologies from security and service sectors, here comes another new messenger which rocks in its own way. Unfortunately, its first 2 runs on my machine weren't successful in terms of proxy connection settings and I didn't had enuf enthu left at the end of the fight to bang my head on this 5222 port thingy!
Anyway,BuddySpace comes in with MAPS along with messaging; maps about global locations of other chatting party, about home or office plan of the place someone is chatting from, or approximate visualisations of the said space! etc. What Marc's team is trying to achieve is what they prefer to call "enhanced presence management."
Here is their philosophy explained! As they put it, one of the many objectives of the whole project sounds like this, "Indicators such as 'online', 'away', 'busy' and 'offline' are proving to be much less useful than more advanced status indicators such 'now working on work-package X', and we need to develop a richer presence vocabulary to reflect this. What should this vocabulary look like?" The way BuddySpace has come up, this so called vocabulary seems to be going to include concepts like, meaningful knowledge exchange, coherent workgroup practice, opportunistic interactions, presence awareness, etc.

I hope to check out the s/w soon on my machine, time permitting and will see to it how it revolutionise the concept of instant messaging, as the development team says so!

Thanks for Being my Friend

2005-01-05T04:12:00.000+05:30

A thank-you note for all my friends (not written by me) .

I can't give solutions to
all of life's problems, doubts or fears,
But I can listen to you, and
together we will search for answers.
I can't keep your feet from stumbling,
I can only offer my hand that,
you may grasp it and not fall.

Your joys, triumphs, successes,
and happiness are not mine,
Yet I can share in your laughter.
I can't keep your heart,
from breaking and hurting,
But I can cry with you and
help you pick up the pieces and
put them back in place.

I can't tell you who you are.
I can only love you and be your friend.
THANK YOU FOR BEING MY FRIEND

Telepathy or something

2005-01-04T13:26:00.000+05:30

Was day-dreaming the other day -- the kind when you aren't fully asleep or awake either and you partially think and partially dream, add to it the hazy nature of dreams, they are sometimes soo unclear (or do I need specs) -- about me going in a rick with her and she asked about that old old wallet of mine! Papa had purchased it from some road-side hawker for very cheap but actually since he didn't needed one so I took it - and me using it since 1.5 years; it now really shows off on that wallet's face I told her that the lifespan of that wallet is over now.
Now I don't remember if I dreamed of it, or wished for that, or was just fantasizing but she gave me a new wallet - not in the rick itself but somewhere I don't remember - all I remember from the dream is a wallet in her hand! What a lovely dream :) but I had the reality holding more in store for me!

Actually met her today and had my share of her hand-made cookies (they taste sooo nice, I never get enough of them, or for that matter enough of her). Before leaving she handed me this gift-paper wrapped box and left in a hurry, for the local was leaving- I opened it later to find a nice leather wallet and I am still sleepless and wordless and equally puzzled!!!!!

Thanks a lot dear, thanks a zillion:) I love you

A Dedication to my F.R.I.E.N.D.S

2004-12-30T18:56:00.000+05:30

Wrote it sometime back dedicating to a few never-ending friendships

...And now break ur trammels,
fly high n fly true.
Leave your impediments with me
please can YOU ?
Live upto your dreams &
forget all your blues
while i sit here and
wish all this for YOU.
'coz I'll be forever glad to have
A FRIEND LIKE YOU !!
- ashish

The Blues

2004-12-28T23:58:00.000+05:30

Took this from the above link, written by some Nabhendra and posted by some friend, I loved the stuff too much to resist copying it here- seriouslly wanting it to reach more ppl! I hope the original-writer(s) won't kill me for doing so without their permissions

So here it goes, verbatim:
---
1. What does the blues sound like?

Well blues is a genre of music just as classic rock, pop, techno, metal etc etc. Just like defining any other genre of music it is very hard to define Blues. It is characterized by a particular note known as the blues notes. the Instruments that accompany the blues are simple ones like acoustic guitar, piano, harmonica. The vocals may vary from smooth melodious voice of a woman to a almost shouting of a worker in a field or a drunkard. The lyrics are not poetic but it sure is eclectic. The topic of a blues song may vary from the baby goin away (most common one), heartbreaks, time in jail, expressing love, expressing or bragging about one's manhood, poverty etc etc. The most characteristic phrases/words of a blues song are: 'Woke up this morning', 'hoochie coochie man', 'baby is gone' and 'mojo'.

The beauty about blues (the good old time blues of 1930-1950s that I really consider as classic blues) is that it is performed without the use of studio full of gadgets designed to make music sound better. It is just pure and simple. Often referred to as 'the devils music', it all about a common man singing about his life, his mood at that particular point of time in a very simple and honest way.

Who started singing the blues?

Long long time ago, in the early 20th century, the land of Mississippi Delta was full of large cotton farms that spread for miles. The work on these farms was very labor intensive so a lot of blacks were employed on these farms. The black workers used to work for hours at a stretch and earned almost nothing. It was a hard time for these chaps. They made those conditions bearable by singing while they worked. They all sung together when they worked on cotton fields, on rail roads, in graveyards. It was in this wilderness of Mississippi Delta that the blue originated.

West Africa has a long and rich musical tradition and fortunately the slaves brought into the US never abandoned that tradition. In the beginning the music of the slaves was confined to their workplaces and was buried with them. As these slaves became free they went places in search work. Wherever they went they carried their music with them. By 1930s the blues had established itself as a form of art. Still it was mostly confined to the southern parts of US. One of the most influential artist of that era was Robert Johnson, also referred to as 'the king of the (Mississippi) delta blues'. Unfortunately all we know about this person who had such a massive impact on modern music is from 29 recored songs and 2 photographs. Recently Eric Clapton came out with an album titled 'Me and Mr Johnson', in which he covered some of the songs of Robert Johnson as a tribute.

The blues got an unlikely boost from the great depression of 1930s. The 1930s saw the economy of the US breaking down. Nobody had any money and people who were hit the most were the black workers. The south no longer had money to pay them for their jobs on the farms. This led to the great black migration towards industrial towns like Chicago and New York. This brought blues to a bigger and wider audience. Soon Chicago became the new center of the blues and artists like Muddy Waters and Howlin' Wolf blossomed here. These two were one of the few ``classic" blues artists who lived and performed long enough to enjoy their success.

How did I come across the blues?

It was surely not an accident. It was going to happen one day and could not have been averted. I was destined to discover the blues.

Its been about for years that I have been listening to classic rock and almost every artist (Dylan, Rolling Stones, Led Zep, Nirvana.. almost everybody) has been influenced by blues. Its the roots of all forms and rock and popular music. It was the great blues guitarists like Robert Johnson, Son House, Muddy Waters, Howlin Wolf, Leadbelly that inspired people like Robert Plant (Led Zep), Keith Richards (Rolling Stones), Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Clapton, Greg Allman etc etc to ever pick up a guitar. Most of them have a have a constant bluesy undertone (Led Zep, Jimi Hendrix, Allman Brothers Bands, Lynyrd Skynyrd) or (other bands that had a more bent towards pop) have at some point paid tribute to the blues e.g. 'Little Red Rooster'- Rolling Stones, 'While my Guitar Gently Weeps'-Beatles, ' Back Door Man'-The Doors (although I insist that doors has a constant bluesy undertone) and the list goes on. It was the music inspired by the blues that these bands played during 60s and 70s which brought about the rock and roll culture and along with it a huge change in the society. Thats why I once said that the blues are the soul of all the fucking music ever made (when I said 'all the fuckin music' I was referring to the rock/pop and not things like indian classical or A R Rehman's stuff ).

I have been listening to all these bands for a while but didn't know how it all begun. At least not until I came across this series of two hour documentaries produces by Martin Scorsese. I had always appreciated the soundtracks and background scores of Scorsese's movies and had firmly believed that this guy has a great taste of music. So I decided to see these documentaries and explore blues. Neither the documentaries, nor the blues let me down. I am happy that I have finally arrived at the core of it all. For a devotee of rock and roll like me its like realizing the ultimate truth, the union with the Supreme.

How does that matter to you guys?

Well unfortunately I am very much sure that as of now you guys won;t like the blues much, if at all. I believe it requires a lot of ground work for enjoying blues. Its very different from the ultra-melodic bollywood music. I think it would be pertinent to present a time-line of a rock-n-roll worshipper. I call it a 'Brief History of a DESI Rock-n-Roll Worshipper'

- Born in a regular desi household which may or not be into popular music. If the household is conducive to listening of music he discovers kishore, rafi, mukesh and lata early on.

-Starts discovering music on his own although he still has no sense of its own. For him a good song is the one that is aired during the prime time on TV channels and is the talk of the school.

-Still hung on to the prime time numbers. Now since puberty has come or round the corner songs with attractive women seem better. Also wants more beats and naughty lyrics in the songs.

-Starts liking a girl. Realizes that the english pop music has quite a lot of beats and cheezy/romantic numbers. Starts listening to Boyzone, Bryan Adams, Bon Jovi etc. At the same time starts appreciating the oldies by Kishore and Rafi.

-Starts getting more and more frustrated. All the promises that were once made are not being fulfilled. Girls are a tough thing to handle. Life is not easy. He needs something more, something heavy, something to forget about all this bull shit. At this point of time Metallica sounds like a message of the God himself and Nirvana is the next best thing. Probably take the first drag of cigs.

-Gets a little more matured. Realizes that lifes just like this and its not meant to be fair. Heartbreaks and broken promises are a part of life. Listening to Pink Floyd day in and day out. Thinks that if one band has said it all its this. Also now the scope of good music is much wider. Its no longer constrained by melody, beats or head banging. Starts appreciating the Doors and Led Zep. Says to his friends 'You know Jimmo is the man'. At the same time starts appreciating Mukesh. And yeah realizes that although Johnny Walker Black Label is the best whiskey but its Bagpiper for him for he is short on cast. Probably take the first drag of ganja.

-One day he hears a man singing in a rather nasal voice and asking questions like 'How many roads must a man walk down, before you call him a man'. This does not seem like a regular song. Its like plateau of poetry over waves of music. But dude listen to what he is saying. Man he is saying all the right things, life is just like that. His first introduction with Bob Dylan is somethin like this. Now he is reading all he could about this incredible man Dylan. Sometimes even thinks that why this man is not the president of the US.

-From now on the rock-n-roll journey picks up speed. He digs deeper and deeper. Each new band bringing him closer to the ultimate truth : the blues. He discovers: Credence Clearwater Revival, Allman Brothers Band, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Dire Straits, Rolling Stones, Simon and Garfunkel, Bad Company, Rush, The Who, Cream, Clapton, ZZ Top, Meatloaf,Tom Petty,.. .. .. .. .. .. .. ... .. and so on

- Also picks up a taste for country, folk and soul music. Now he can appreciate Fleetwood Mac, Joni Mitchell, Johnny Cash etc etc... He is almost there. At the same time realizes that Hemant Kumar was the dude.

- Finally he reaches there. This is where he was destined to my friends. He finds the blues.

So guys blues hits you really hard when you are ripe for it and I heard it I was all ripe for it.

---

How about a million $s ?

2004-12-20T01:37:00.000+05:30

The other day someone asked me what would I do with a million dollars she would give me? What a silly, age-old question. Its been asked around, like what, a million times itself !

Still I hadn't put soo much thought in it. can say that no one before this offered me a million $s

Well lets see wat can be done with a million of them. I am a conservative person most of the times but once in a while I need to do exotic things to keep my adrenalin levels high! So I'd put some of them in bank [u see, future planning] Would order as much roses, of all colors (including black!!) to fill my sis's home with them; I love her above everything else
. . . And, well sounds silly by all standards n so much out of the way ("hey Ashish! Why would u like to waste your money that way?"), but I'd surely would give away something to orphanages or old-people homes. I said some since money doesn't matter much to them- for all they need is love n two square meals! I'd better devote some personal time with them along with some monetary support and lots care/love.

D'oh the billsLoving exotic things comes with a price tag too:( No matter how much I save/earn or be conservative in spending, but I surely run out of my finances every now and then. Cann't say/think/decide much about it- except perhaps that I'll be more cautious while buying gifts for ppl n eating out next time I am out of home n while making phone calls [the 3 things that almost eat all my resources!]. Oh and being a geek I'll surely get a nice, fuking machine for myself; with tons of processing power, infinite memory, a cutting edge graphics card to run some games n a state of art internet connection

Huhhh so much for a million I don't think its worth your/mine time to read/write this! I don't have any damn idea about MONEY. Add to it poor future planning and I end up ruining my finances every month in hostel:( Actually, I think the best person to ask for is papa- he has managed the family sooooo well all these years, raised akka and me so nicely, we never had to compromise on things- where we had to their love more than made up for the compromises. And . . . . well I just love them, a lot!

just a small wish

2004-12-15T04:19:00.000+05:30

. . . wishing so for all my friends, especially for some special ones- who know they are being remembered, missed and loved in a special way.

Always have faith in yourself and stand tall
'Coz I cannot see u ever fall.
Relish your work n time, and don't forget to smile
'Coz your outlook, hard work and efforts makes life worthwhile.
Of not only you but mine too, in some ways
I don't know how but that's what my heart says.

- ashish

Love you all

3 wishes n a jeanie !

2004-12-08T01:36:00.000+05:30

Whoaaaa ! Where the hell did ya find that jeanie I have been looking for him since ages man!
   nahhh not for his 3 wishes but just to be frnds with him Guess 3 would be too much for a satisfied person like me who doesn't need soo much.
     Hey but dont take me otherwise, afterall wats life without wishes eh??? I sure have 1 or 2 of them! Firstly, I do have a list of some special people in my life for whom I'd ask for nothing but just "forever-happiness".
Talking in general wat else does a person need all along in the long-run of life, in the end it all boils down to a 6" x 3" space to be laid to rest!
But being realistic of my needs/greeds/dreams/futuristics/etc. I'd surely wish for a "forever-job"
But not for instant money but rather for some source of work which can earn me money slowly n surely- not much but enuf to satisfy all the needs [will think of the greeds the next time I get another lot of 3 wishes]...If u want u can call me too lazy to think of all my greeds like this; nothing like I dont have any, I am damn greedy person, but dont have the enthu to spend my brains thinking of wishes!
    Oh and by the way you can have the remaining third wish! And like I said I don't want to spend time thinking of such (silly) kind of wishes, I want you to hurry up things, just ask for any damn thing and get off! I am despo to take my new-found frnd(the JEANIE!) with me to home

Jokes apart, I'd seriouslly love it more to be frnds with jeannie
instead of being interested in his wishes!

Rocking With A Rebellion Inside !

2004-11-22T09:05:00.000+05:30

Donno why but since pretty long I've been wondering why do I like RATM so much? I am soo strangely attracted to RATM, that I never get tired of listening to them day in n day out; over n over again! Their rebellious nature sure strikes chord with me! Especially their dig against the system in general, and the govt. in particular. Apart from their political stance which is almost always against the govt. they have, with equal energy, talked about socially relevant topics. And importantly they mean it too- firstly not only they have talked stuff, but they have also DONE stuff for the causes they talk about, and secondly when everyone (including the labels which they didn't signed initially) was thinking it was essentially bullshit they were talking about, it was just a stance pulled to shot to flimelight of nu-metal, that time RATM proved out not to be hypocrites- they have been consistently doing things and keeping their voices high on topics like
corporate America, govt.'s subjugation, short-sighted policies, cultural
imperialism, etc.

Apart from that I think its something abt their style too, had it not been so then I might have not been keen about Regenades of Funk - its ALL covers but still I love it as well as I love. The energy and an unbeatable sound is extremely enticing and it rants not just through my ears but my brains n my body.
They are creative in their ideas to talk of masses, rejuvenate the listener, and be a food for thought; and are equally (and nicely) sarcastic in their lyrics
Quoting Zack himself, the purpose of them coming together under the name RATM was to " . . . bridge the gap between entertainment and activism; . . . "

Its fresh, its raw, its energetic- it will blow thru' your
body and sit in ur heart!!

She's got to Beat me MORE !

2004-11-18T19:02:00.000+05:30

Guess its her turn now I've had my share for 20 long years!

Actually I've had my chance when small, had put up many 'all-time shows' worth remembering and seems like my part is done for! Akka has had her share [and mind u it was a biiiig share by all standards] of beating. I remember it all as if its a thing from yesterday only- it was an ritual which I followed without fail - the moment mumma-papa were out for marketing or went somewhere, I was on her. As obvious, she had IT a lot more than I used to have IT from her. Oh boy! and that variety of stuff - how will I ever forget it? Could be endless punches on her shielding hands at times (that is from the time when I was too small to remember it properly); or pulling her hairs-just pulling and/or sometimes dragging her in our house; the most common being general fighting on mummy-papa's double-bed or kitchen; and pinches/slaps/punches/tingling is but of course a part of IT all!
And then she used to bolt her room from inside or lock me in a room with my books to do away with our fights :D Between I never used to let her do that but every dog has his day ;) Mostly she used to run into bedroom before me taking a stock of the situation and bolt it from inside, or worst still run out of the room and lock me inside Sometimes the endings used to be more melodramatic- when we both used to get exhausted fighting and had to call it off- resting under fan and drinking water and eating something and the fights used to dwindle away unknowingly into nice (and off-topic) talks :) At other times one of us sometimes, unfortunately used to get more than desired (from the other sibling or some object!) and immediately the scene used to change from that of fighting to caring/sympathizing/loving. At other times her swearing that she would complain to papa-mummy used to scare me off.

The ending as anyone would guess used to be very sweet. Firstly, whenever she heard papa's scooter stopping outside- she used to ask me if she should tell them or not and . . . . . well regardless of my replies/jokes/teasers they would NEVER know about most of our sweet fights- though they knew it always and used to tell her at times NOT to be soo protective about me but then that's what sisters are for, aren't they. Secondly, the sweet part of the endings was the love that it all fostered between us. Oh how much we laugh at each other and ourselves remembering those days- whenever we get nostalgic this topic surely comes up without fail- with me wondering what made her took sooo much of beating and everyone wondering how come we fought so hard and love so deeply- well let people keep wondering; meanwhile I am sure I have the best sis in the world and we are the most loving pair around

And regarding her chance-- off late I have lost the charm I used to find in doing all that- instead I love getting it the way she used to get it!!!!!! Whenever I am home, all day long I'd tease her, prank her, pull hairs (she hates if anyone mess around with her hairs!) and tingle her a lot -- just to set her off and then I cherish a slight beating from her- the charm doubles if I get to hide, heads-down in her lap or hug her or . . . . But I never get enough of it- didn't knew a sister's beating could be soo lovely! Guess
She's got to beat me MORE, a lot more!!

Well, let the fights and the love continue . . . . . I love you akka

Obnoxious Girls!!

2004-11-17T01:54:00.000+05:30

I won't say no one puts it the best![that'll be an over-statement]. But I love the way Bill puts it and makes Sus n Calvin flirt . If not the best its among the very best way I have come around to say IT. Well no hard feeling but frankly speaking I have stabile faith in the theory that girls are made of crazy stuff!! Anyway I will leave all these regurgitations of my 'going-around-in-circles-about-girls' mind for some later time. I was just reading "my collection of C 'n H"[catalogued] all over again and rightaway wanted to share a few of those nicely put fwd. thoughts here. Last but not the least, Bill does it marvellously and quite obviouslly is my star hero

Coming to the actual comic stuff here are some of the mootings on that[read feminine] side of the world:

Well to get this one completely you need to go thru' a few previous ones.

[. . . .Ssshh some girls are listening n I am gonna pay for this post from my nose ;) ]

Hitmaps!

2004-11-16T01:49:00.000+05:30

As known to anyone, people have been trying to understand and
predict the climate ever since ages. Frankly speaking I have just an iota of idea about all these thingies in details but now that I read a bit on the topic I am able to say a few things that I know them. Going about studying climate, Statistical methods are more about collecting data and banging your head [read applying Numerical Methods!] against the data. Smarter way to do so might be mathematical modelling only! You at least require some mathematics to predict stuff!
They have been largely following 2 methods for this viz, simplified and approximated models which work with some restricted parameters like, location specific models, atmospheric-conditions specific models, etc. These will neglect effects of small things or approximate them but more complicated modelling includes many more miniscule details than these restricted models. And they do need to know what all can happen- mathematically and practically- with small small changes brought out in these parameters. Climateprediction is one such ongoing project at the Open Univ, UK. Their vision is to "improve methods to quantify uncertainties of climate projections and scenarios,including long-term ensemble simulations using complex models."
Now since they needed to test run their models and use a truly random dataset of conditions to test run their models and at the same time needed to keep a track of who is running their model where on the face of the earth. So to locate the users downloading their models Jiri came up with Hitmaps! Using these its been a matter of click only to locate people using their climate-prediction s/w. What Hitmap actually do is to display the [approximate] physical location of visitor to their site. A database relating user's IP to geographical location is needed as hitmaps take the IP and simply display whatever location it gets based on IP, on the geo. map. Well in the first place authenticity and accuracy of locating IPs on a map is difficult to establish. But on a larger scale with a broader look like this, it works fine.

But this is only the start, what Marc's team is actually trying to achieve is what they prefer to call "enhanced presence management " as they have explained in their philosophy!(w.r.t. instant messaging!) One of the futuristic vision of the people [Yanna] working on this project is research on ". . . . 'presence' in the online and wireless connected world and [to]investigates the potential of massive multiplayer games and playful multi-user interaction based purely on 'presence' information." I am clueless as to what kind of games that would be or how this techno. could be exploited in games already available. May be 'coz as I said I have next to an iota of idea about all this techno. and may be 'coz I am not a gamer. Someone pls. enlighten me, if you can!
But nevertheless, at least this project satisfies my curiosity of keeping track of the geographical presence of the people reading this .The principle behind it is "Hits to a web page are collected by including the thumbnail HitMap image into the page (as the one at the top of this page). The IP of the page requester is translated into geographical coordinates and stored in a database. Once a day, the Hitmaps map images (the thumbnail image and the rest of maps it links to) are updated according to the database" as stated on hitmap's website.

Unfortunately, as of now they are moving their servers and hence no more new users are allowed to register. I will be putting up one hitmap for this blog to but lets see how long they take

from fwd. mails!

2004-11-14T22:37:00.000+05:30

A rhyme from some fwd. mail:

Jackwa aur Jilwa
Gaye upar Hilwa
Pani bhari ke waste.
Jackwa gir gawa, uka khopdi fut gawa
aur jilwa aawat ludhkan pure raste!!!!

"I do not know where family doctors acquired illegibly perplexing handwriting nevertheless, extraordinary pharmaceutical intellectuality counterbalancing indecipherability, transcendentalizes intercommunications' incomprehensibleness".
This is a sentence where the Nth word is N letters long. e.g. 3rd word is 3 letters long, 8th word is 8 letters long and so on . . . . [vocabulary apart this suits so well to akka]

The Natural Progression of a Relationship !

2004-11-13T14:28:00.000+05:30

I don't have any slightest ideas as to from where I copied this! Its from some site (you can google and also lemme know, I'm too lazy to do that now!). I'm not sure if it applies to others too or how commonplace is this procedure of falling in love; but I feel the same in my case! And of course, would like to know how others feel about it.
During 'Diwali cleanliness drive' I found this deep inside one of my folders - Oh by the way I was cleaning my Hard Disk. Thought would share this with others too!

So n'joy being in love . . . .

1) Interest and Attraction -- this is where two people initially see or meet each other and decide they both want to get to know each other better.
2) Infatuation and Falling in Love -- this is the stage where you become blinded by your emotions and oftentimes behave like a love-sick puppy dog. The attention and mushiness of the other person makes you feel really great about yourself and you begin to fall "in love".This is all about how YOU feel about yourself because of the other person. IT is NOT love. It is that thing that reduces you to a slobbering fool who speaks in "baby talk".
3) The Comfort Zone -- this is where you start to relax, and move out of the infatuation stage into something more "real". This is also the time where feelings begin to deepen towards the other person while experiencing a reduced feeling of being "in love".
After being in this stage for awhile many people make the mistake of thinking the relationship is in trouble because they aren't still infatuated. In reality, the relationship is beginning to grow into Mature Love. So many people bail at this point and never actually reach the "Love" stage.
4) Mature Love -- this is the real deal, folks. You have reached the point of having a genuinely mature relationship, that, if you have chosen the right partner, is a beautiful thing.

Reaching Stage 4 doesn't mean the fun is all over, though. You can and will go from stage to stage at different times throughout the relationship. You can even learn to do things that will make you and your partner feel infatuated and falling in love all over again. Most relationships are either made or broken during the Comfort Zone.

Actually Happy Diwali

2004-11-12T01:05:00.000+05:30

Fortunately tonite wasn't like the rest of the 3 diwali nights I have spent in hostel! Couldn't be home even though had got reservation in advance! Had to sell off the tickets to a friend since end-sems are closing in real fast; of course without me getting serious about them
Anyways, the first year diwali was the worst :( For the first time I was not at home (thankfully didi was there with papa-mumma!) and I was kind of very lonely on diwali night. I still remember how I had slept till late evening whereas Ishank had cleaned the room and took a bath and was moving out for dinner! I took a bath and by that time whole wing was deserted (half had already gone to their hometowns). Around 10pm these wingmates came in with crackers and asked me out to be with them, bursting crackers! That time only saw my spirits slightly uplifted (of course a missed dinner and no sweets must have had added to my plight- though I don't remember what was it, except it all being sad enough to make me hate anymore diwalis in hostel).

Second and third year's diwalis must also have been too casual, since I don't remember anything about them! This year was kind of dull at start. I hadn't been out of my room till evening. Actually had got up late! (at lunch time and ate and took ages to check mails and read slashdot. Played a bit on my comp and watched a movie (Before Sunset). It was Vardan who came up late in the evening telling me to get ready and "we are leaving, to eat out." I generally got ready without much on my mind!

But I must thank you ALL for the lovely evening. Vardan, Atin, Ishank and myself went to Hiranandani and had large pizza with coke and icecream at Baskin Robbins . I wanted to be there only till late in night but had to come back pretty soon (around 8:30 only, since had Ranjeet's dinner with us!). I wanted to just be with wingmates- may be kind of sitting someone in HN and generally having a talk or silent moments together, watching crackers bursted, happy faces all around, some bird-watching, etc.
But nevertheless, it was a wonderful evening, came in hostel and had fun for a few hours, they were bursting big crackers in wing corridor, fking the hells out of my ears! I hate those biig bombs; anything that harsh/loud makes me freak out. But still with wingmates, donno how I actually enjoyed that! Called it a day finally at around 12; back to room, behind a closed door since some friend came online. Slept happy-happy and glad to be here this diwali :)
Well on the same lines, I wish to be at Uncle's home in Borivali some diwali too; which diwali has yet not came.

2004-11-11T13:12:00.000+05:30

~! Alive !~

. . . . yeah still alive! and I am soo glad about it, and so thankful
Actually was reminded about Sachin again and was feeling sad at missing him like this . But also was thankful for being alive myself ! It all reminds me of those really chancy things I have done at some point in my life!
Well.. I am sure some scarry ones are slipping me but I'd rather not force myself to think of ALL of such chances - so good for me, lest I'll be I am more afraid to take risks and more thankful to some unknown(so called GOD?) Still some of them were these weird, read on . . .

* Must have not been more than 5 years old. u know that kind of cute, chweet, ignorant, playful, loving-all kind of kid next door who is ..... (Oh enough of it- you know how wonderful I am ). There were these 2 kittens in neighbourhood (South Civil Lines, Jabalpur!) - the brown one quite playful and that damned white one was sooo elusive. As usual like you, I am also not satisfied with whatever is in hand. Afterall 2 birds in bushes are better than one in hand eh? Went after that white kitty one day- climbing the narrow boundary wall (covered with slime n algae from rains); climbed using a iron gate which lay useless supported against that wall. I remember it was rinky-minky's home! (Ohh how much we 3 played whole day together! Donno where they both will be I dont even rem how they looked like!). Anyway as usual that kitten disappeared in a wink over the roof - IT went UP and I came DOWN! Oh boy some fall that was- rolled over that iron gate and fell head-down on bricks in rinky-minky's garden. The scar on my scalp still reminds me of those stitches!
. . and I recollect things (from my folks description later) - how MUMMA was having this gut-feeling of all it since evening before I went to play and was sitting whole time in the window! Oh God! who gave these moms, sisters and girls this sixth sense. Damn they always get me- cannot even lie to them :(

* Oh and that "sholay" show . Diwali night in our home in indore- I must have been in 10th or 11th standard. Sholay was being broadcasted on Doordarshaan and we all were having a nice time with Amitabh when suddenly lights went off! Akka went out to realise some arbitrary sounds coming from nearby and some burning smell!! Goshh it was our electric meter's wiring on fire. I had to(and I did) pull the main-switch off, with the electric meter burning a few centimeters away from it! (huhhh I have never seen sholay completely in one go).

* It was first year- working in MoodIndigo (college cult fest) as organiser. Some guests were to come in some house next morning and it was very late in the nite when we realised the lights in that place weren't working. Without any help foreseen from power house people, we 2-3 guys went with candles and I fixed the LIVE thing at the electric meter (ever seen those 4 wires going into the meter from below - 2 coming from main-lines and 2 going inside the mainswitch and then inside the home-line). It had to be that way(live) since those coming from mainlines cannot be switched off !.. Ha Ha Ha

* And how dumb of me to put my beloved at risk with me It was during the joining of 2004 freshies' batch when anshema was here with anshul! That time those panthers were being too bitchy- chasing people on even main road and killing a few poor souls around this area! Anshul had college work so used to sleep early at nite. And of course mausaji-mausiji both slept early , leaving we both IITians lukhha 'n sleepless at night (nothing unusual for any IITian!). Actually anshema and I were going around walking alone on absolutely deserted roads (in the campus only!)- with even security people, patrolling at night, telling us to call it a day off and go and sleep, on more than one occasion. Now i realise how foolish it was to put our life in jeopardy like that.

* Recently went out on bike to purchase something from opposite IIT maingate at midnite. Coming out of the IIT gate on the highway, the traffic lights are yellow at night time (Yellow=wait, SEE and go). Not wanting to slow down I straightaway headed to cross the road (no wait and no see, just GO!). And it was the same nite when a few hours later we lost Sachin in a road accident. Next morning I was soo distressed as well as frightened listening about his accident and my driving...... well still I am speechless! Could have been me too, u never know!

But all is well that ends well and it has been ending its best all the time I take a plunge off the cliff! And I am thankful to my stars that I am sitting here writing this blog. There have been soo many other incidents n small accidents that make me realise the need to be definitely more careful next time!

Between I think small accidents should keep happening once in a while- they keep shaking us into reality and defying our presumptions like, " How can something bad happen to me? Nahh Nahh I am just fine and I can do whatever I want to do - after all such things happen in news 'n movies only, and that too, to others! I am good person and I will die old! "

She´s a Rainbow

2004-11-10T17:07:00.000+05:30

Can listen to it day in and day out. In fact since last two days my playlists have come and gone like wind but this one song still managed to hold on to all my playlists ! enjoy . . .

-by The Rolling Stones
[download]

She comes in colors everywhere;
She combs her hair
She’s like a rainbow
Coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere
She comes in colors.

She comes in colors ev’rywhere;
She combs her hair
She’s like a rainbow
Coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere
She comes in colors.

Have you seen her dressed in blue?
See the sky in front of you
And her face is like a sail
Speck of white so fair and pale
Have you seen a lady fairer?

She comes in colors ev’rywhere;
She combs her hair
She’s like a rainbow
Coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere
She comes in colors.

Have you seen her all in gold?
Like a queen in days of old
She shoots her colors all around
Like a sunset going down
Have you seen a lady fairer?

She comes in colors ev’rywhere;
She combs her hair
She’s like a rainbow
Coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere
She comes in colors.

She’s like a rainbow
Coming, colors in the air
Oh, everywhere
She comes in colors .

Rain Rain ........delight my ears again !

2004-11-09T06:20:00.000+05:30

Guess what? ... me continuing with my obsession with rains What if its not raining, its raining in my heart!
Actually searched for rain*.mp3 in my songs folder and got all these 28 songs ! Oh gawddddd I never collected songs specifically with rains in my mind; but then I am glad to have suchaaa nice 'rainfull' collection, especially since I have it unknowingly.
And the ones which deserve a mention are:

- January Rain by David Gray [OST of Serendipity ]
- She's A Rainbow by The Rolling Stones[download]
- Box Of Rain by The Grateful Dead
- Raindrops Keep Fallin' On My Head by B.J.Thomas.
[someone plss explain this song to me!]
- Have You Ever Seen the Rain by The Divided Highway
(can you search this song on net?)
- Buckets Of Rain by Bob Dylan.
- Water Color In The Rain by Roxette.
- Queen Of Rain by Roxette.
- Caught In The Rain by Revis.
- Only Happy When it Rains by Garbage.

Oh and by the way they have said,
"Rain rain! come again, and
take away all the pains!"

something something.....

2004-11-08T10:45:00.000+05:30

Its been a long time ... pretty long ... I was afraid if I dont write something fast then it'll be a month between 2 posts ! Will my blog hate me for that ? Or will I hate myself to be soo busy killing time that I didn't got time! Or if someone reads this blog later and finds no posts for so long what would (s)he think ("you lazy bone, ashish") ??
Well one might wonder what could be the reason for not posting so long (did I say I was busy killing time ?) and again wonder why posting now. Nahh you got it wrong- my blog won't hate me ever and I am too lazy/freewheeling to give it a damn what others gotta think!! Well there is this guilty concious in me and its shouting its head up! but still I wont stick my ass on this chair to write simply 'coz of some reason like that ! ... Oh reason .....

Oops! divagated again !

..... we were on the the reason why I am back here- its 'coz IT RAINED LAST NIGHT . Hey in fact no posting since Orphic Rains sure makes these 2 postings uniterrupted and a kind of sequel!!

Anyway I was saying it rained last night ! It rained and oh boy! it did rained graciously. I was soo overwhelmed. Donno actually why? Shouldn't have been ! Although rains came after weeks of dryness and mostly everyone enjoyed it (except, of course, those who got washed over or got struck at places ) but I was more aroused than I think I should have been.

The effect lasted a few hours wherein fortunately no wingmate minded the high volume songs and my delirium; in which I wanted someone to go to lake side for a walk ! (though missed going there)
And here are a few lines I sent to friends on messenger; wanted to talk to someone who loves rains

".......else everything is soo damn exotic rite now .. it rained and its suchaa nice cold breeze .. I am feeling on top of the world and soft light romantic music ..... its like .. .its all soo wonderful .... "

Soo childish isn't it ? hmmm so how does the child inside you shows up?

Orphic Rains

2004-10-18T05:37:00.000+05:30

Alas! It hasn't rained, here in Mumbai, since what seems to be ages . I have always loved rains like..... like some indescribable thing !!
Imagine the feeling of being washed down by rains; completely drenched to the bone; as if you are standing at the base of a dam and someone has opened the sluice gates on you! I vividly remember the train journey to Indore in June '04. It was somewhere around 7 in the morning with heavy rains and I was standing at the door of my compartment- rather was half hanging out . And by jove! the biiig raindrops were hitting me hard like bullets !
Oh boy! What experience :-) Have you ever, in your life, experienced a cloud-burst without a raincoat or umbrella ? Please lemme know so if you have, I'd love to hear about your experiences!

Between here is something I came up with this rainy season. Hard to say how I figured this particular collection of these particular words but you can hold 'her' and the rains as the nearest culprit

Enjoy !

The Instauration: It was late night time (can say early morning !) when I was sleepy and working on my comp. sitting in my chair and looking out of the balcony; when this far of bulb, glowing dimly in the rains, suddenly caught my attention !
As the rains slowed the light became more visible, as if the rains had been stealing its light !! Not to forget my comparison of 'herself' to the 'dim light in the rain' and the figure slowly dissolves away with fading rains !
By the way, i have zilch idea about 'her' ! it just came to my mind so used it.

Orphic Rains
~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It rained again tonight.
From my balcony i saw out
n admired that far-off, twinkling, faded light.

Oh! how the falling drops shine
they steal its bright
but fade THE light.

But wait i see something more,
Out there !
and I hadn't known something so amazing
I swear !

I guess i saw u dancing,
on the falling drops,
and on that mystical, floating cloud.
And amidst the lush green crops
I could hear u sing aloud !

Singing ur heart out, yeah you were,
Getting blown by the winds n drenched to the bone.
But you, your figure n words were, to me, so blur
As if u were living the minutes all by ur own.
Living a faded life like that light
Hiding from the world, all ur bright.

But its so vicious of FADING RAIN
to take the beauty which lies therein.
Fading driblets n the brightening light
And in the upcoming lights i find myself losing a sight !
Sight of You !

As the light grows bright
and you melt in the rain
fading by each minute
and my sorrow, to it, I impute.

Now that it doesn't anymore rain
but I think, out there, somewhere
You still dance on watever remain !

But a thing more I'd like to write
And it all seems to me so much true and so right
That one day u'll come out n shine so bright
That no rains could mar ur worth n ur might !

-ashish

* Inspiration: my veiled love for her!!

* Location: where else than my balcony? :-)

* Glossary !! Didn't knew the exact meaning of these few words myself before writing this piece:
Orphic - Having an import not apparent to the senses nor obvious to the intelligence; beyond ordinary understanding
vicious - able or disposed to inflict pain or suffering
impute - Attribute or credit to

another of my unfulfilled dreams

2004-10-10T23:44:00.000+05:30

Just made my first posting sometime back. But was actually thinking of blogging since over a week.... sorry my dear blog! I couldn't spare time for u before!
Anyway I was reading an old piece of writing ! and thot would share it here (anyone reading this pls lemme know with whom i shared it ).

Dont rem exactly when but its been pretty long back when I penned this one down. My guess is last week of Sept 2003~!!

Anyway here it goes:

Another of my Unfulfilled Dreams

Wat if I knew a lil' bit of Magic ?
These nights wouldn't have been, then, so tragic.

for,then I won't be dozing off here.
instead, we would have been near.

I wouldn't have to sit here & miss u so much.
would have fulfiled my wish, of u to touch.
yes, to touch u, to feel u, to talk to u all night.
since u are the only thing that seem so right.

but ain't I making a fool of the reality around me.
but isn't it u and ur name that rite now surround me?
Oh yes, even this reality is soo relative a term, it seems
anyway this magic will remain just another of my unfulfilled dreams.

- ashish

---

location: Sitting in balcony of my room after an all-niter, early morning time.....

Inspiration: ....and wanting to fly to u !!

obiter dictum !

2004-10-09T15:49:00.000+05:30

by the way obiter dictum is the latin for "something said in passing", or an incidental remark!